I stood up for myself

Well I did. I always tell the kids to stand up for what they know is right. I never knew how hard that would be until yesterday. There was an issue with one of the kids that I look after and I did everything right. The other person went up one side of me and down the other trying to make me feel small and ashamed. The thing is, it didn't work. Most of the time I am second guessing everyhting I do - was it the right thing? Did I do everything the best way I could? Did I think about everyone involved? A lot of times I feel that I could have done something better. Well this time I was certain that everything went well. I even wanted to share what had happened with the kids' mother because said child was quite sensitive about the whole thing and that's where this whole journey started to get rough.

It's funny y'know, because I don't look like someone who gets pushed around. I'm loud, sarcastic, opinionated, and I ususally speak before I think (I know most of these facts are shocking to some). But there I was having someone trying to belittle be for something which at this point is trivial. I was being treated poorly. I was thining to myself that this is what we teach our chilren to stay away from. The girls are learning about bullies in school and when they ask me what a bully is, I tell them that it is someone who makes you feel yucky inside. It's not always hitting or pushing - sometimes people use words to make you feel like that.

I had to do something about it. I tried my best to explain everything, but there was no budging on the other side - just anger. Now I understand that a mother reacts to things that affect her child in a very different way than to things that affect even herself, but I could not allow this woman to continue treating me in a way I wouldn't allow others to be treated. So I stopeed it. I told her that she couldn't do that.

Now I am dealing with the emotional rollercoaster of the aftershock. I am sad because our children are friends. How will that affect them? My girls were sad and I am having trouble explaining the situation to them without making people look bad. I told them that they are still friends with this child and that it was something that mommy had to do so that we could all try to stay friends.

I stood up for what I know was right. I wouldn't let myself get pushed around. It was extremely hard to do. I'm not pleased with every aspect of the outcome, but I am proud of myself for doing what I did and I can become a better mother because of it.